This Labor Day weekend, my family celebrated our 74th family reunion.
Yes, seventy-four years of food, laughter, storytelling, and enough cousins to fill a football stadium.
We’ve got five chapters: Pennsylvania, DC Metro, Virginia, New York, and North Carolina (our origin city).
And because it was here in the DC area, I was in host mode. And if you know anything about the DC Metro chapter… we’re a “go big or go home” crew.
Cookouts. Banquets. Dance floors. Matching T-shirts. Coordinated line dances.
I loved every minute — while secretly plotting where I could nap between events.
And that’s where ADHD fatigue comes in.
Wait — What’s ADHD Fatigue?
When most people say they’re tired, they mean:
- “I need more sleep.”
- “I need a nap.”
- Or, “I could use a lazy weekend.”
But ADHD fatigue? That’s a different beast. It’s mental exhaustion, emotional overload, and neurological differences all rolled into one.
Think of it this way: while my neurotypical cousins just needed a little coffee after brunch, I needed a nap, an IV drip, and maybe a replacement brain battery.
The Science Behind ADHD Fatigue (Reunion Edition)
- Neurological Energy Use
The ADHD brain has to work harder to focus. The prefrontal cortex — planning and focus central — is underactive, so we light up extra brain networks just to stay on track.
👉 At the reunion? My cousins were hybrids cruising down the highway. I was an old pickup truck guzzling gas just trying to reach the cookout. - Dopamine Dysregulation
ADHD brains leak dopamine — the chemical fuel for motivation and reward.
👉 Which means: my cousins made it through the banquet and after-party. Me? I was leaking dopamine faster than sweet tea with no lid at the cookout. - Executive Function Fatigue
Every choice takes effort. Neurotypicals rely on habits. ADHD brains? Every decision burns fuel.
👉 Example: Neurotypicals push a grocery cart with wheels. ADHDers? We’re carrying ten bags with no handles — in formal wear — while someone asks if we remembered the raffle tickets. - Emotional & Cognitive Load
We feel more. And masking — pretending we’ve got it together — drains energy fast.
👉 Imagine running the reunion while wearing a weighted vest. You smile for pictures, but inside, you’re chanting: “Please let me nap before dessert.” - Sleep & Circadian Rhythms
Many ADHDers have delayed sleep cycles, waking up tired no matter how long they rest.
👉 It’s like charging your phone overnight, only to wake up and see it’s stuck at 60%. That was me at the family prayer breakfast. - Crash vs. Gradual Burnout
Neurotypical fatigue is a slow fade. ADHD fatigue? It’s like slamming into a wall.
👉 One minute I’m dancing the Cupid Shuffle. The next? Face-down on the couch. Game over.
What ADHD Fatigue Is — and Isn’t
ADHD fatigue isn’t:
❌ Laziness
❌ Lack of willpower
❌ Just “needing more rest”
It is:
✅ Neurological overwork
✅ Dopamine imbalance
✅ Executive function overload
✅ Emotional weight
✅ Sleep that doesn’t restore
That’s why “rest” doesn’t always fix it. ADHD fatigue is wired into how our brains use (and lose) energy.
So yes, my family reunion was incredible. I laughed, danced, ate, and loved on my people.
But while everyone else went home “tired,” I went home ADHD tired — the kind where your brain battery refuses to play by the rules.
And if you catch me napping under the buffet table at the next reunion? Just know — it’s not the potato salad’s fault.
It’s ADHD fatigue.